Ingredients to Life’s Beauty

By: Mariah Moghadam

The most beautiful moment in life is experiencing things that you know will not last forever.
It is intimate.
It is warming.
And it is heartbreaking.
To understand what is happening before it is too late is just as painful of not knowing what you have until it’s gone.
Some of us experienced this.
Many of us heard about it.
However, when you, yourself, undergo this, it’ll change your life forever.
Recently I’ve experienced this. I didn’t know what was happening until I looked into my sister’s eyes.
We both sat far from those who ignited the moment.
We watched them laugh around the kitchen table, interacting with one another in a foreign language.
Our father was more enlighten and more alive. With a smile on his face that showed all his freshly cleaned teeth for the special occasion.
They spoke loudly, exchanging: excuse mes, thank yous, and you’re welcomes.
My sister turned to me with tears in her eyes, which reflected my own.
I saw our shared happiness.
I saw shared excitement.
And I saw shared sorrow.
Sorrow for what we were missing.
Sorrow for what we never had.
Sorrow for what we cannot hold on to.
For what we were experiencing was intangible, because those beautiful moments are moments that will turn into memories.
And memories will fade over time.
But I will make this promise.
I will remember their smiles: each of their teeth different shapes and shades.
I will remember their laughter: some loud, some soft, some childish, but mostly loud.
I will remember the food they made that filled the air with smells of Middle Eastern species, garlic, and lemons.
I will remember playing cards and drinking tea.
I will remember saying sobh be kheyr and shab be kheyr, every day and every night.
At that I’ll say: I will remember those memories even when they turn to fragments, or faint memories.
Similarly to the memories I have of my father’s mother. My memory consists of her holding my hand, touching each of my fingers, and tickling the palm of my hand, saying “lili lili hozak.”
Even though memories fade to fragments, memories never truly fade.
They were intimate.
They were warming.
And they were heartbreaking.
However, we have experienced it.
Changing those who were apart of that everlasting moment.
Its compassion.
Its laughter.
Its smells.
Its taste.
Its beauty.
And I believe these are the ingredients that allow us to experience life’s beautiful moments.

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